It's that time of year, and with Hallowe'en/All Saints' Eve/Feis na Samhna around the corner, you know what that means. It's time for my Hallowe'en/All Saints' Eve/Feis na Samhna rant!
As it's well-known, Hallowe'en/All Saints' Eve/Feis na Samhna is sort of like Christmas for fluffybunnies. And so this is my present to you, my dear New Age goofballs: you are not today's victim. Instead, I am going to rant about ridiculously overcautious parents. That's right, it's not even a history, culture, or language rant; just a lambast of childhood-killing ninnies.
Try to get your kids to trick-or-treat while it's still light out. If it's dark, make sure someone has a flashlight and pick well-lit streets.
NO, YOU FOOLS. IF IT'S LIGHT OUT, IT'S NOT
This holiday (which is really a festival) was once the New Year's Day of the calendar of cultural peoples collectively called the Celts. The civilisations of these Celts were agricultural ones in ancient times (many of them still are today) and followed a way of measuring days that actually makes more sense than the way we do it now: the next day would effectively begin at sundown. Technically-speaking, Hallowe'en is the first day of November, beginning at sundown on what we think of as 31 October in our post-industrial calendar. Hence, the original name of Feis na Samhna
, which translates into 'Feast of November'. (NB to fluffies: when you say 'Samhain', what you're really saying is '(the month of) November'.)
If you want to give your kids the chance to dress up in costumes, just take then to an anime convention. And you hardly need a special day for loading your rugrats up with sugar (and from strangers, no less). The darkness is even more a part of the festival than a vinyl Optimus Prime costume from Wal-Mart or a bag of Snickers. (I am especially disapproving of all your jack-o'-lanterns: not because pumpkins are a New World crop and not traditional, but because PUMPKINS ARE NOT FOR CARVING RIDICULOUS SHAPES INTO, THEY ARE FOR EATING. Stop wasting pumpkins on bad crafting attempts unless you are making something undeniably awesome like this
Do it right, or don't bother doing it at all.